Happy Friday Everyone...

Good Morning,
I can still say that because it's 10 am my time, and I have been up for an hour and a half. As much as I like to sleep in, and I would have really enjoyed sleeping in till Noon today, it is really bad on my system and makes everything go out of whack. One of the most important things about fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue is to follow a regular sleeping routine. In bed same time each night and up at same time each morning. This takes a lot of self discipline and especially at night, because that is when I feel my best and I don't want to go to bed when I finally have the strength to clean the oven. But in order to be the best mom to my kids, I have to realize that the oven is not as important as being there for my bright eyed son at 8am. My goal is to be in bed asleep by 10 pm. I really need a DVR and that is so not in my budget right now. Good TV shows are on at 1o pm. I am weaning off the nighttime tv, there is a lot you can watch on the internet now but last night I took my meds at 9pm instead of 8 pm. (The Mentalist) was on. But also my son is with his dad for 2 days, so I knew if I did have a problem getting up, it would not affect him. But as I got into bed I realized that the cable guy was due to my apartment between 8 am and Noon. It is 10 am and he is still not here yet. It really can put a damper on your morning routine, can't really shower, or be in the middle of a yoga video, and then knock knock. I did do some morning stretches and some yoga stretches that while uncomfortable, always make me feel better afterword. I then rewarded myself with a cup of coffee and now am sittingon my couch writing my blog.

I slept much better last night and woke up ok this morning. My shoulders and lower back are pretty tight. I am craving a massage..lol. I am still feeling a bit rough, but as the medicine increases I think I will adjust better and better. I feel happier inside then I have in such a long time. If I look back at the past year all I see is darkness and the years before that were years of frustration and just trying to get by. One of the things that complicates the chronic fatigue and Fibromyalgia is that I am also type 1 diabetic. People with three chronic illnesses are often found to be depressed too. Besides the three illnesses, I have had the most awful year anyone can imagine: this last year my best friend was murdered, I was sued, we went through a bankruptcy, lost our house and pets, and now going through a separation and divorce. So even if I am eating right, following sleep patterns, taking all meds and vitamins, and doing my exercises, if I am stressed out I flare up. My blood sugars climb high, all the pain comes back and I get sad again. Or I get angry, frustrated, tired, and emotional. Sometimes I feel hopeless.
I have a wonder woman in my life who is mentoring me through all this. I hear her voice in my head sometimes saying "Don't go there" and I am able to pull back and do some deep calming breathing. It really works. She has taught me to ask myself "do you have control over this?" and if the answer is no, then I have to release it. If I do have control to do something, then I need to really think about the best way that follows my life plan.
People with this disease have to have a life plan. You can't just go day by day and bounce here and there. It doesn't work. It's like getting paid with no budget and you go to the mall, out to dinner, then to the movies, then your kids want money. Then you notice that you haven't paid any bills and there is not enough money left. That just makes you want to give up and climb back into bed. So you have to get up with a life plan: For example on Mondays I do laundry, watch tv and do a general house picking up, On Tuesday I clean both bathrooms, On Wednesday I have Bible study and then lunch. Thursday is mom's group at Carries, and Friday is general clean-up and vacuuming. The rest of my time is spent with my 3 year old. We play, we color, we go on walks, we work on flash cards and read books. By the time my 16 year old is home from school, I start thinking about dinner and what I am making that day. Usually I already have it planned out, just gotta do it. My 16 year old is in charge of dishes and that helps a lot because I start the day with a clean kitchen. After dinner is bath time and rest. The weekends are just for fun. That is when I can go to the mall, go to church, meet someone for lunch etc. Your time/energy is like spending money, once it is gone, there is no going back, no payday loan. You just have to learn to be self disciplined and that is a hard lesson for this girl. But I am learning. Some days are harder then others. But I am learning to like my life. I like the peace in the morning, the structure of the day, the control over my environment. It's just looking at from another angle. Instead of being sad and having a "why me?" attitude, I have a "why not me?" attitude.
Well that is all for now. Happy Friday everyone!